Friday, May 23, 2008

I can't go to far away - from my heart

It rained. it's raining. right now. god said rain. she said rain. so. rain.
raining now, that's what I mean. Sometimes I don't see or write things in the moment and sometimes that's all i do. because it's all you can do. It's all you can hold on to. you can fall. you can say all the right things, or wrong things. right or wrong. she isn't going to be sleeping next to you
gone. see it's gone. the moment.
I forgot to blink the picture into my mind.
what was it that she looked like, tasted like, and who does she remind me of.
just like that,

water cascades down my window. glass blurry, water-stains, and dark sky.
I am ready to leave. bag packed. all i need :
the keys, blanket, tooth-brush, glasses, the note-book. the thing is, it's not what you take, it's what you leave behind.
I told you it would. I'm talking about the rain part. It had been to long and things were dry, fires were starting up. pyro, i suspect. a flame doesn't start itself. everyone seems to have a grudge these days. it could be the high prices of oil, or disney- world tickets. it could be nothing. or it could be what i told you was true.
I could see her signals. I could see that sometimes they were for me. don't think I don't see them. the shallow breathing, the staring at the ceiling in the dark. It could smell like me. but it doesn't. feel like me, and it will never.
did she miss me? did she miss me
a lot today.
don't think this is what it isn't.
or is.
or I'm not really sure at the moment. because you know how i am with moments.

the trouble i have sleeping, the tornado dream. I know what it means. I know what it means to
go there. I know.
if you get lost-
do I ask the scarecrow for directions? the witch?
are you the witch?

she tells me..." there is no place like it". I say "where?" then i understand.

friday's are all about driving. driving home, driving to bars, driving at night, driving to see her, driving away.
we all have somewhere to go.
extraordinary together- ordinary apart. i think I heard that on t.v.
something that keeps repeating. like that song. like the tornado. chasing me. chasing you. chasing words, chasing rain. the pavement, the night, the head-lights, the windshield wipers. your moment in this silent storm.

1 comment:

cafe selavy said...

I just came to your site for the first time. Good stuff. I've bookmarked it. I just went through the photos, but I'll read. OK.