I wont play your song until you get here

Where the good life starts
 with a smile and beer and they way we used to feel. do you remember all those used to feels?  she slides into her slip- on shoes purchased on her last trip to Mexico. She starts to think of all the boys who used to whistle and honk their horns when she walked down the side walk.
While the good life starts without me Ive waited for the bus to school and I waited for the lights to change and Ive waited for you.
Oh i have waited and waited and i have passed the time singing in my car, praying to the gods, i have passed my time jerking off and playing games.
the good life starts when you want it to and no sooner or later
it starts when you hold her hand or let her go. when you start over or go back. The good life isn't memories what you did yesterday. its today right now, its every day.  come live the good life. come and slip down into your shoes and  walk and walk and shine and walk some more.
I want you to tell me when your good life starts. I want to be there when you finally remember those used to feels. and you smile and you offer me a beer and we drink and we wait- for the good life.  

withdrawl symptoms include :

I kept trying to sort out the hows and whys of everything but some bottomless green eyes kept getting in the way. Fine day, Fine music, Fine beer and it had been a long long time since green eyes. So I wrapped up the whole problem and shoved it into a cubicle over in a side corner of my mind and slapped the door shut. A man should have his weekends, no matter what he does.

Its over, I tried

Got it bad for a girl who lives where the cold wind blows.  sometimes she writes to tell me how she dreams of my summer skin warm with the glow. how she misses me and if I do too? … my girl  she is good at archery, with arrows poisoned tipped and with the long con. I always fall.
In her dreams there are no nets and in mine there are no goodbyes. There is the start of something, many words, long pauses. We meet and as soon try to forget. Our fuck is a drug. She is my love and my enemy. We have everything. Then nothing.

This is how we forget:

We finish what we do and say our goodbyes. It’s part of the deal to bury our secrets like the dead.
I lose another piece of myself. The time it took to swim to you, to kiss, to fuck, to heal.
My head feels hot . I have a fever. I walk around trying to shake off the heart attack. Im long down the highway before my pulse is back to normal. The feeling lasts for days. The mind doesn’t want to forget. The body never forgets. I’ll remember how good you felt years later. The words and the silences.

you are a part of my cabin in the heart

Ive said it before between the lines here and there. I look at hers. she looks at mine. She knows. Im reckless and obvious but nothing is ever certain, Is it?
I want to talk and hang out and go on road trips together. I want to hide out and fuck and create. these stupid chemicals make me want to marry her and watch her and use her and make her art. I want to put it into words but as you can see I fail at it. Im old enough to know better. It’s a mess. A blank page has suddenly become a massacre. nothing is certain.

 After life:
She goes on without me to wait for the school bus. Second day in a row she’s ignoring me. It’s weird how one day someone seems so into you and the next acts as if she doesn’t know you at all. We fucked lets get that out in the open. We did and many times after school while her Mom was at work. Her Dad split years ago, the things she let me do to her must have been pay back. All the girls ive ever been with don’t seem to have Dad’s around. Its just something I run into not something I look for. Shes over there now talking to some guy, they smoke cigarettes, laugh, she touches his arm. I shrug my shoulders. Its not the end of the world - it just feels like it.

to these i do not want to forget

Hated the nights for the lies we told. How she comes along with her slooooooooow game makes me feel like Im her rising tide then takes everything away. Silence and grace. Smiles and teeth. Im left here to write this shit about you.

 Ive said it before between the lines here and there. I look at hers. she looks at mine. She knows. Im reckless and obvious but nothing is ever certain, Is it?
I want to talk and hang out and go on road trips together. I want to hide out and fuck and create. these stupid chemicals make me want to marry her and watch her and use her and make her art. I want to put it into words but as you can see I fail at it. Im old enough to know better. It’s a mess. A blank page has suddenly become a massacre. nothing is certain.