would you tell me if it felt any different?

Ive done good
and bad
learned to wait
my turn
in line
and not get
upset

i feel i
changed
things
with you.
for all of us.
i promised
to be better
next time

there is no next time
but i like to tell myself
there will be
it helps fill the pages
in my notebook

the sticker says
i voted
and i vote
you always
let me.

my luck has
been cold at times
but running hot
as of late

baby,
Ive said to
many things
i wish i
didn't

and i miss
calling her
baby
(things like that, i wish she wouldn't know)
and baby
i forgave you
only
because you
you wanted
it
not because
you deserved it

and i deserve it even less
so, who
are we kidding?

we share things that no longer
matter
and yet it all matters.
the
birthdays
and babies
our special days
just silly games

baby, id say save
them
for the other one

but, baby,......

I know if i say baby again
it will wear itself out
and become meaningless
like how my loving you
looks so pretty on
paper

real life
isn't fairy tales
but should be
it's where everything
changes
even if it means breaking
the rules
to make
things work

it's where i live with you
and force you to listen to
my sad song
music
because
we are just
that fucking
happy
we won