snug as a bug in a rug

snowed in:

only you hear this
dog whistle
only you see this
remnants
of torn
paper

i promised not to speak of
our last night
about the moon
or electrical wires
fire works
or snow
fall

let's share
this
burden of
lies

snowfall
the moon
electric wires
fireworks
my ghost

lay
silent in
this
burden
of truth

you fit me
like an
old winter
coat

good thing

snow fall:

I've minimal grievances directed at your hearts sway
my hand taking yours
this is where i want you to touch me
>>>>C<<<<<
let's share this
weight of
winter

blizzard:

small hands
hurricane heart
filthy mouthed
these aren't even
what i like
best
of you

- 16

There were slow words and long goodbyes. we finally meant something to each other, but it's late, it's in dreams, it's as shiny little ghosts.  It’s been so long I can hardly remember the real thing. and I cant hardly forget.

I get hard thinking about it. You. I come. I sleep. I write. I get hard thinking about you. It. Do you?

I got all five fingers inside. you still have your spell on me. You let me have you like I wanted and it's always going to trump the average day to day bullshit grind or that other one you married or the ones who wish for you now.

That sickness we have. Shit, I thought it was love but it’s some other disease. I’m blind. I like you for what you are. I don’t speak. We don’t lie. Good things still will happen. We should fuck again. We should let this burn until......

0 Eleven

this is it.
i close my eyes and it starts
like this -
I take the year out, lose myself,
find myself.
dedicate to writing,
to listening,
to living.
here we go-
magic.
here we go-
sunshine.
a mini
novel
a
niche
love affair
novelty
poverty
prizes

art: blackapple

messages that fall like snowflakes

frost on the car windshield, or ice, i don’t know. I'm unfamiliar living in south Florida with the terms, with cold-  brisk winds, with what most probably view as usual winter.  LL Bean flannel shirt, cafe racer motor cycle jacket, over doing it. how many more times will i get to wear this? to look heavily clothed. to feel warm and  secure. false warmth, false security. I'm over doing it because that's what i do. it's that good or that bad and nothing in between.Yet, in between is where i live. the devil between us.

 I'm making it out to be colder than it is, I'm making it hurt more than it does or should or ever would. she didn't hurt me has bad as i say. Ive almost forgotten. Almost.

 its not really that cold out. but, what I'm feeling isn't fake. it never is, it never was.  I want comfort. warm. do you remember what warm feels like?

the sky is clear. night. day. night. somewhere there is wood burning.  it smells like mountains and pine trees. like my cabin in the woods. like the dream i have of a cabin in the woods. books and music piled floor to ceiling. a dog by a fire in twitch sleep. breathing. always forever breathing.
music with horns or piano, string bass. maybe cellos. music for the lost loves and pets and family. winters we spent silent. guitar drone the lyrics you can’t quite make out. this is vague. these are my words and my arms around you on a cold night. warm.