Friday, June 5, 2009
I don't know how to dance but i can make it rain
it rained again. i think it will all summer. I remember one summer, off from school it rained almost everyday. I stayed inside and cut photos from magazines, I read books. I sat at my desk next to the bed and wrote you all those fucking letters. I looked outside my window. I could see the girl next door, the girl with glasses. I could see her through her bedroom window. She was writing something too.
it rained and so I drew a picture of swollen sun with yellow magic marker. I drew birds and power lines, a road to anywhere. anywhere outside. anywhere with you.
she would call me on the phone from time to time. breaking the silence. breaking the sound of rain drops and thunder. the long silence. she was my drug and she knew my number then, by heart.
did you ever know my number by heart? am i still there. I wonder if I am still there. in your heart?.
I wanted you to forget me. I wanted to forget that rainy summer. I wanted and wanted and that's a terrible thing.
now i want nothing. now i have everything. now it rains and it doesn't hurt so bad. I know i am in your heart, down deep, but there. always there.
i have everything.