longest kiss of the year

there were storms today.
after the storms,
bliss.
a slight change in temperature.
tingly skin.
the longest kiss of the year.

the devils hand reaches-
to remind me of you.
please, i said.
"whisper me
the words of your god."

dangerous with a pen

this is what i used to do while at work when things were slow. i gave myself 15 minutes to come up with and draw something or else id go back to working. It was to replace what i'd normally do when it was slow, which was to go online and read her journal, look for porn or other eye candy, download music, or write something stupid on one of my own journal things. Hey, It was more productive than jerking off in the corporate bathroom stall. (although that would have been quicker and felt better)

silly drawings are another form of getting the extra noise out of my head. like everything else that would flow from a pen or in this case a sharpie it ends up just another way for me to bleed.

I had this idea that anyone could come up with a little saying and draw a picture to go along with it. it's easy right? when i see it, it looks easy enough and except for the drawing part and coming up with cute lines. I did okay. I guess. nothing that's going to end up on a t-shirt stretched out across some girls tattooed chest or put up on someones kitchen wall, but that wasn't really my goal. It was 15 minutes of distraction. I moved on to something else before i had the chance to learn how to draw a decent robot. I'm not sure what it was, i haven't drawn anything for a long time. there is a good chance that's it for the year so i wanted to see them all in one place. now that i have, I'll move on to something else.

Be good or be Gone

the other tragedy- I'm yours but hopelessly romanticize every situation.
at the grocery store i look into other peoples baskets and when i catch someone looking into mine i wonder if we all don't fall in love a little.
just between produce and dairy. the smell of candy, of fresh baked bread.
At check-out our carts lightly touch. her bug bitten legs. my chipped finger nail polish left on since Halloween. its my job to notice. its my story to tell. we browse the magazines while waiting our turn: new chewing gum, new fade diets, flu-scares, celebrity faces, horoscopes.
she pays. i pay. we go about our separate ways. our separate lives.
a quick glance, a slight smile enough to know it isn't just me.


it was who she was in the dark, cigarettes and mumbled sleep and a hundred other things nameable and not.

the devils in me. sadness. no reason- maybe the radio.
cellos. calamity.
maybe I'm not sad.
this could be calm.
this could be what soothing feels like.
this could be me without noise. i listen to my inside voice. no echo.
the vibrations are a hum.

the trouble with everything is how suddenly it could turn to nothing. every candy a toothache in a fancy wrapper.

a book filled with poetry and fuck stories. my lies. our lies. our nothing.
the devil is loose in my heart and she likes it rough. like it was in your room the night you let me stay. A sunny skied morning turned a starry night.
whatever she says. whatever god says.
whatever the darkness tells me to do.
after dreaming i write to her. i want to click send and open old wounds.
she fucked the words out of me.
bleed.
I'm sorry.
the vibrations are a hum. good bye again.
This is us. this is how we follow through.

baby, Im a vampire- Interview:JULIA TROTTI (photography)

I've been itching to feature work from this young and talented photographer for quite some time. I have been consistently blown away by her use of light and the touching way she displays softness in her art. like shattered poetry- like haunted photographs. The fact she's just 18 years old with so much yet to come.

I'm pleased to introduce: Julia Trotti. She is 18 and hails from the land down under. Sydney, Australia.

Good Winter: what do you love about photography
julia trotti: I love how I can create my own little colourful world, and show people a piece of my crazy mind.GW: do you remember when you took your first photograph?
jt: I don't remember the first time I pressed a shutter release, but I do remember the first time I fell in love with photography. I went on a walk with this point and shoot camera that was lying around the house, and just starting taking pictures of everything and anything that I saw that I thought was interesting. They were terrible photos, but I just had so much fun doing it, that I knew I didn't want to stop after that.

GW: what are some things that inspire you in and around your town?
jt: I live in a place called Cecil Hills and there are all these lakes and fields and well, hills, around everywhere. I'm very fortunate to live in such a beautiful place, it makes taking the sorts of photos that I do so much easier.

GW: what movie haven't you seen that almost everyone else has?
jt:Probably a lot actually, I don't watch that many movies. Every time someone mentions, "oh, have you seen that movie where.." I hardly ever know what they are talking about! Haha.

GW: what makes you crazy?
jt: To me, being crazy is a good thing, being crazy is what inspires me. And the things that make me crazy are the things that I can't put into words and that are really hard to express in a way that people can understand.

GW: what or who inspires you ?
jt: This is always such a hard question to answer, because everything inspires me. I can be inspired by the smallest thing like a street sign or an empty jar. Really, just everything and everyone that I see inspires me. I don't even think about it anymore, everywhere I look, I see a photo.
GW: favorite books?
jt: I don't really read much, but I loved Alice in Wonderland and can read it over and over.

GW: 4 favorite places?
jt: My favourite place is mostly lost; lost in my head, in fields, in the ocean and in the stars.

GW: What is currently on your music playlist?
jt: Amanda Palmer! and the Dresden Dolls. I'm obsessing over them lately.

GW: describe what a good winter is for you?
jt: For me, that would be a Sunday morning, where its cold and raining outside, but I'm in my warm bed, sleeping in!

GW: most prized possession?
jt: I suppose that would be my camera. I don't think I could go without taking any photos at all.

GW: what are some of your past Halloween costumes?
jt: I haven't really dressed up as anything for Halloween, but if I did, I would dress up as a different Alice in Wonderland character every year. They're all so peculiar and look like so much fun to act as.

GW: 4 things that you collect?
jt: Sugar packets, photos of sunrises from my bedroom window, empty jars and the number 52.

GW: whats your secret?
jt: To be able to make something from nothing.

Please check out Julia's other sites:
http://jtrottiphotography.viewbook.com/
http://vampire-zombie.deviantart.com/
http://jtrotti.blogspot.com/

Where to begin

i ran something over the other day and i don't know what. she calls me out of the blue and i wasn't paying close attention to the road. I don't think anyone does anymore.
im doing things and nothing gets done. does this happen to you too?

I said hello.
i wonder how she got my number. but, I'm easy to find she says and knows it's probably on purpose. i was probably waiting for this. it's what i wait for. Okay. fill me in.

I say, listen, here is what's new:
she's off the pill.
I make an awesome black bean taco.
after the best night of sex Ive ever had i was offered a frozen waffle for breakfast.
I don't just love the ones i cant have anymore.
I love the ones that love me.
dust and pornography have collected on my laptop.
I don't let the stories write me.
There has been to much coffee. not enough sleep.
Ive been hearing my inside voice more and more.
i like pumpkin anything and peanut butter anything.
you anything.
I don't lie unless you ask me too. I like when you ask me to.
Ive been bored with music lately.
I play piano. I drink beer and wine.
I'm going to Mickey's not so scary Halloween party at Disney World 10-31
I no longer eat meat (only fish) .
she likes when i tell her stories.
she believes she still loves me.
I believe in ghosts.
I can no longer find comfort in words.
I don't read what you write.
this is distance.
this is as close to silence that i know.
i think about you almost every single day.
this doesn't belong in the category of secrets.
i like keeping your secrets.
this isn't everything.
it's not far from the truth.